My dear Camyogis,
For months I have known this day would come. I don’t know how many letters, sentences and lines I have formed in my head, moving towards this moment.
What to say, how to express my innermost feelings in a clear, honest way? Probably the best way is just to dive in from where I am right here, right now. No place other than that, remember? As we have been practicing over the last few years – discovering power in the simplicity and honesty that arises out of the present moment!
I became a firm believer and practitioner of moving through our practice (life!) in a slow, mindful pace, especially in the face of challenge and change. One step at a time, one day at a time, one breath at a time, ….
On another level – the power of the ‘practice’ (whenever I say ‘practice’, I refer to the extended practice of how we live our life on and off the mat!) is not always the final ‘posture’, the destination we’re heading towards, but what we need to learn is found on the way – within the transition itself!
If we lose the transition, if we lose the connection, we lose everything we could otherwise learn and experience on a deeper level on our journey towards that ‘posture’ (that destination). Whether it’s the first time ‘Down Dog’, or the thousand’s time – each time you move through it, it’s a different transition, it’s a different experience, so it’s likely to feel different; you learn something different – but if you rush through it, you miss out on something!
So, finally the moment has come. I’m going through some transformations. I will leave Camyoga as a regular teacher, moving on, going home. It has been an incredible ride. More transformative and expansive than anything I could have ever imagined, as I sat in front of some of you for the very first time, almost four years ago. Teaching my first Thursday ‘flow’ class in English, gradually becoming more confident, more authentic, as I began to realize a simple truth – that the inspiration and all the answers we are looking for lie within us; All we need to do is spend some time with ourselves to discover it! Stop, listen, observe, and breathe.
Our true teacher is within ourselves!
That is the incredible power of surrendering into the present moment. We never truly know how amazing things will turn out, and often, it is beyond our wildest dreams. We just need a little faith. We need a little faith in the scariest and most breath taking moments of our lives, and then we witness how it often turns out to be the most life affirming and transformative element of our future. And even more, the magic of transformation is that not only do we evolve and grow, but everyone around us miraculously does as well, “because we have been blessed with new eyes, (or ‘no eyes’) new vision, and a whisper of space that is grace between the proverbial ‘rock and a hard place’, so to speak” (Veronique Fleming).
As for now, I do not know exactly what my next steps in Germany will be, but whatever they are, I am certain I will move forward with a wide open heart, filled with gratitude and joy over the last few years at Camyoga!
There are not enough words to express my gratitude for the gift this sacred space has provided. I bow to every single one of you who have blessed Camyoga and my life with your presence and trust. I bow to Louise, who keeps preparing the soil for all these yoga blossoms to beautifully emerge; all the students, teachers and amazing staff, who have been there along the way, deeply committed to do something beyond the ordinary. Realizing that indeed, there is nothing more valuable and precious than that anywhere.
As one of my daughter’s Kung-Fu teachers, Craig Gallacher, says, ‘the source of transformation is awareness, focus, resilience, and integration‘. In my own words – start to create a relationship with yourself. Be present. Spend some time every day in silence; keep coming back to your own body, mind and breath. See what inspiration lies within you, what discovery can you dig up from your own beautiful mind! And then bring exactly that into the world!
You have left a deep imprint in my heart! Thank you for simply being who you are.
Bowing to the great unknown future;
Deep peace, love and namasté,